The Commitment

Commitment comes in many different forms, including visually. He loves his back tattoo. But could you also love his back tattoo? I just...can't.

Pretty Sure He's a Serial Killer

No proof, but...come on. Best foot forward?

Cool if I'm Homeless: delving into deep questions

I don't even know what we're talking about anymore, but it's clear to me that I'm wasting my time.

Cool if I'm Homeless UPDATE

I've discovered something absolutely hilarious after being prodded by friends to respond to this homeless guy in the interest of this blog; this homeless man is the saxophonist that plays below my ex's apartment during the day and drives him bonkers! I have added reasoning for contacting him now. I can't guarantee I'm going to date this guy, but I will definitely see what else he has to say about being intentionally homeless. 

As my friend just said on Facebook when I made this discovery, "Your ex will die when he sees you making out with the homeless guy below his building. Do it oh god don't do it ok do it."

Liars

This guy

Is NOT this guy. 15 mins later, I got the real pic. Poser.

This guy? Also a poser. 

He's on two different sites with photos of celebrities. Before I figured out who the B-list celebrity was, I had begun talking to him and discovered he was actually a 62-yr old man. He was really nuts, too. Enjoyed duping women and taking them for a ride on his crazy train.

And THIS guy is not a real person. This is clearly a cyborg or something. No conversation needed.

Not a real ninja. 

Although I do believe Starbucks is the dark side (because I have an addiction), this guy is not Darth.

'Merica

All the YES

Do These Make My Butt Look Big?

Boys Just Wanna Have Fun

He has fun, alright.

Talk the Talk, or Walk the Walk? DATE

Outfit: plum top that hides the muffin top, good butt jeans, new strappy heels with bird feather adornments, teal toenail polish.

Plan: dinner/movie turned ice cream date

Outcome: Constant communication until today, then some hesitancy on his part. He's cute, so I was willing to be a little flexible when he told me he was broke until payday on Monday. Would you be flexible for this face?

I wasn't sure this dude was legit because he's so hot. I mean, out of my league hot. So I made him send me a photo holding up three fingers.

So he's definitely real. And so broke that after pushing back the time, I ended up being stood up tonight. He just sent a text, 2 hrs past the original pickup time. Not sure if second chances are appropriate when we've never gone out. I'll have to think about it. I mean, I shaved my legs and everything.

Is it cool if I'm homeless?

This guy wanted to know if he had a chance with me. I looked at his profile. If you remove the hippie-dippy fluff from the sentences, it basically says he's homeless and squatting in Kaneohe.

To his credit, he defends his way of life and insists that he's not lookin for a sugar momma...but, really? 

Basketball Robbery

Anonymous Lakers fan

Bike guy

Talk nerdy to me, baby. Points for originality!

Not So Nice

Apparently some people like to use online dating as a means for taking out their frustration on strangers.

Gingerbread Man

Can't catch him, he's the gingerbread man!!

Andddd ew.

Lip tattoo

Disturbing. I can't even figure out what his says. I bet that hurt

Catman

I'm actually more impressed with his creeper mustache than with the floating cat head and Christmas sweater.

Friggin Stoked

It started with this...a "mutual match" over my appreciation of his photoshopping skills; he superimposed his face into this iconic image of a ponycorn costume. How could I not give him 5 stars?!

But then I discovered even more amazingness...a novella of a profile with so many words that I could barely read it all. I'll let you check it out for yourself.

I feel like I should get a trophy for reading the whole thing. No...really...what's my prize?

Catty

I sure hope this isn't the persons real photo. But even if it isn't, there is a real person out there that looks like this.